Me, too?

Perfection, as we have been taught, is a lie from the pits of Hell. No one is absolutely without flaw. No one is physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially and socially spotless. We all have junk whether we admit it or not; whether we share with instagram or not. We all struggle.

My struggle is quite simple. I know what I want, but I get antsy and wander off into something easier, yet less beneficial. This happens far to often. I was afraid to run for homecoming queen, so I became campaign manager for the young lady who won. Anytime I find myself afraid to be challenged or afraid to revisit a familiar space, I run. Fear makes me run. I prefer to live separate from the thing rather than finding a way to become one with it.

Relationships are easy when they’re dysfunctional. I’ve had enough of dysfunction, yet I chase after easy. Whyyyyyy?!

Some days I’m so sure. I see the promises of God and I embrace them as my own. Other days, the same promises seem like a page from the story of someone else’s life. I’ve seen so many others be blessed and elevated. I’ve seen it before me; in front of me. God says if I can see it within me, He will bring it before me; in front of me. Yet… some times I just don’t.

I won’t let go of God’s hand. One way or the other, I’ll soon know whether the promises of God truly are Yes & Amen, for me too.

I am Eryka.

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