Personal

But you don’t see me though…

I am quite frankly the -i in invisible, but no one notices me. Crazy thing is, -i am a rather significant syllable, but you can pronounce the word and understand it’s meaning without me.

Did somebody do that on purpose?

To avoid making this a long drawn out post about feeling forgotten or disregarded, I choose to tell another story. The truth.

The truth is, I’m valuable. Where ever I serve, I serve well. Whatever I do, is done well. When I give, it’s genuine and from a place of Love even if it’s only a paper clip. I consider each person and their feelings as I deal with them. I speak softly and smile often. I I am firm and I set boundaries and that seems to be where I begin to lose, with people that is. People don’t like boundaries. Sure, many people love the idea of being constrained to a certain set of beliefs or ideals, but ultimately people disrespect their own boundaries often and willingly!

Why is that so? I’m beginning to understand that it’s not me that most folk have issues with me. It’s not me that people avoid – it’s simply my boundaries.

I don’t let guys feel me up and kiss all over me, so they stop calling. I don’t put out on the 1st, 2nd or 15th date, so I rarely ever get to date #1. I tell my friends the truth about the guys they meet and often warn them to avoid the trouble that awaits them; in return they go after the guy, ignore/disregard me while doing so and show up to my inbox or doorstep when he proves to be a jerk. And like a good neighbor, there I am. Boundaries in tact. Position unmoved, yet I’m able to wipe the tears of those who’ve made me cry. I choose to smile at those I know have cursed or defamed me. I keep giving even when I realize the recipient may never repay.

My boundaries are built by my character and I’ve worked hard to become this Eryka.

This Eryka – doesn’t allow just anybody into her home, wallet or heart. This Eryka – is careful about speaking on the phone with gentlemen callers and even more careful about spending “quality” time which ultimately has no quality at all. This Eryka has a vision in mind! This Eryka is headed somewhere.

I am building. I am constantly building my brand, myself and my space. I can not afford to have it compromised yet again.

So… InvIsIble I may be, but you can’t have “invisibility” without me. 🙂

This Valentine’s, I cooked dinner for the family and Mom got me flowers, a bear and a big Hershey Kiss. Valentines has always been a rough holiday for me. The world chooses to play cupid with it’s gifts and Romantic gestures, but I’ve honestly been single or in a horrible situation on that day since I was real young. I do remember the year all 3 of my brothers came into my Kindergarten classroom and got me to take me to lunch. All 3 of my big brothers were there that day. I wish I could say the same today, but I am grateful for every memory I get to hold close. I digress.

I am Eryka

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